For much of her life, Madison felt trapped in a cycle of darkness that she couldn’t escape. No matter what she tried, her depression would not go away. Depression had consumed her, leaving her feeling like a mere shell of herself. She now calls this her “husk era.”
No matter how many medications she tried or how much she willed herself to push through, nothing seemed to help. She grew increasingly frustrated. Her antidepressant medications were not working, and doctors did not seem to be listening to her. She didn’t know where to turn for help.
The Breaking Point of Depression
Things became unbearable for Madison when she found herself institutionalized for a week. Upon discharge, she was prescribed eight different medications. She was told they would stabilize her, but instead they numbed her completely.
“I was just breathing, eating, and sleeping. That was it,” she recalls.
Each day felt like a blur. At first, she believed the doctors knew best and wanted to trust the antidepressants would work. But as time passed, she realized that her life was slipping away from her. The medications dulled every emotion, stripping away not only the pain but also the joy, the laughter, and the small moments that make life meaningful. Every morning, she felt like herself for just an hour before the mental fog set in, clouding everything.
It wasn’t just the medication that failed her. The mental health system itself seemed indifferent to her suffering. Madison’s psychiatrist never ran any brain scans or tests to further diagnose her depression and improve her treatment. Instead, he merely refilled her old prescriptions and made small adjustments that did nothing to address her worsening condition.
Desperate for improvement, Madison tried going off the medications on her own, convinced that she could manage without them. But instead of finding herself again, she spiraled further into hopelessness. It was during this time that she hit rock bottom. She turned to her parents and finally admitted: “I need help.”
Discovering TMS at Inland Empire TMS
Desperate for something that could pull her out of this downward spiral, Madison and her mom began searching online for alternative depression treatments. That’s when they found Inland Empire TMS.
At first, she was skeptical. What even is TMS? The idea of using magnetic pulses to treat depression sounded intimidating, and in her mind was associated with electroshock therapy and lobotomies – outdated psychiatric treatments. She nearly hung up the phone when she first called the clinic. But thanks to the kindness and reassurance of the staff, she decided to give it a chance.
It was a leap of faith, and one that would change her life forever.
How TMS Changed Madison’s Life
Madison admits she was reluctant and skeptical at her first few TMS appointments. She had convinced herself that nothing could truly help her, that she was too broken to be repaired. So she expected TMS to fail her as well. But over time she noticed that she felt different. Gradually, the fog began to lift.
She started noticing small but significant changes. Things that seemed impossible before were now coming back into her life. She felt present in her own life instead of simply existing. She felt a renewed desire to reconnect with music and picked up her guitar again for the first time in years.
Even her coworkers noticed the dramatic improvement. One day, while laughing with others at work, her boss jokingly asked her if she was high. The new Madison was a night and day difference from the Madison they had become accustomed to.
Perhaps the most emotional moment came when she played a song for her mother in the garage one evening. By the time she finished, her mother was in tears, overcome with joy at seeing Madison engaging once again in the things she loved.
That was when it hit Madison: thanks to TMS, she was really, truly alive again.
The Role of TMS in Recovery from Depression
While TMS was not a magic switch that immediately fixed everything, it gave Madison renewed hope and strength to do the work needed to heal.
“TMS isn’t just a fix-all. It’s not like you sit in a chair and your life is perfect. But it gives you the leverage, the strength, to do the work.”
Madison’s mental health assessment scores quantify the dramatic change she experienced:
- Her anxiety score decreased by 81%, putting her in clinical remission
- Her depression score decreased by 83%, also in remission
- Her PTSD symptoms dropped by 68%, a significant improvement that allowed her to separate herself from the trauma that once defined her
Additional Benefits of TMS
Thanks to TMS, Madison’s relationships have healed. Her family now truly understands her struggle and is supportive of her journey. Her self-worth has been restored. She no longer sees herself as “damaged goods.”
Her sleep has drastically improved, something that she didn’t think was possible. Instead of oversleeping 13 hours a night and still waking up tired, she now experiences restful, restorative sleep that leaves her energized when she wakes up in the morning.
And perhaps most importantly, Madison now sees a future, something she once thought was impossible. She still laughs at how far she’s come. She can’t believe the difference in herself now from what she was before.
Her message to others? Don’t let the darkness convince you that healing isn’t possible. Because it is.
Transformational TMS in Murrieta, California
Madison feels grateful every day that she found Inland Empire TMS in Murrieta, California. From the very first visit, Inland Empire TMS was different from other psychiatrists she had visited. They listened to her and didn’t just try to prescribe more antidepressants.
Madison’s story is similar to that of many patients at Inland Empire TMS. Frustrated with depression treatments that don’t work, they were relieved to discover TMS. Even for severe, treatment-resistant depression (like Madison’s), TMS has been proven to deliver relief from depression.
Like Madison, if you are struggling with anxiety, depression, PTSD or other mental health issues, TMS at Inland Empire TMS may be the perfect solution for you. To schedule an initial consultation, please contact us online or call (951) 228-3743.
At Inland Empire TMS, we help patients in Murrieta, Temecula, and Menifee improve their mental health through TMS therapy. Later this year we will open a second TMS clinic in Corona, offering TMS therapy to patients in Corona, Riverside, and north Riverside County. Schedule a free consultation today to receive a full mental health evaluation to see if TMS can help you with your mental health struggles.
You can see Madison’s full interview on the Inland Empire TMS Youtube channel at: https://youtu.be/F3fpRERjqek?si=fb1ySaMHn4P1_dM3
